A Letter to my Strong-Willed Child

My Dearest Strong-willed Child,

When you were in my womb I told people you were going to be my calm child. Your sister, is also strong-willed, so I prayed against all odds that you would be calm. Never pushing your boundaries. Gentle, meek and kind. I prayed and God laughed at me. Instead He gave me another little girl who was 10x more stubborn and bull-headed than her big sister. I’m sure He still laughs at me.

When you were born I knew right away that you were going to be strong-willed. Maybe it was something in your eyes. That sparkle. That mischievous smile, the same one you still have today. It could have been that first night in the hospital with you. You didn’t sleep a wink.

However, I didn’t realize how determined you truly were until you were a year old. Your sister took a toy from you. Like she always did. This time you didn’t cry and run to me. This time you marched right up to her, grabbed your toy out of her hand, like she always did to you, and then you pushed her. We constantly told her, and your cousins, that you were going to grow bigger one day and stand your ground. We told them to watch out, to quit taking things from you just because you were smaller. I didn’t know one day would come so soon. She was so shell-shocked, she forgot to cry. one years old. You were already holding your own. Don’t tell your sister, but I was proud of you for sticking up for yourself, of course I scolded you for pushing. Still, I realized that day, you will not tolerate someone walking all over you, that even at one years old, you would hold your own. I was proud.

A few days later you started climbing on everything you saw. Stools, stairs, chairs. You tried to climb out of your pack n’ play. At two years old you fell out of your crib while trying to climb out. That day we switched to a big girl bed. A year sooner than mommy wanted to. After transitioning to the toddler bed, you strolled to the side of the bed (which was your crib with the side off) and climbed over the side. rolling into your bed, you looked at me, grinned and yelled “I did it!” I realized that day, your determination was something that guided you, nothing gets in your way. You will not allow one fall to keep you down. I was proud.

My dearest strong-willed child I want you to know that even though you test me and push my boundaries, I love your personality exactly the way it is. You may ask me for something after I say no, over and over again, thirty times. You may know I won’t give in, but you still ask. Your will to have what you desire may wear on me a little but I know from life experience, it is this very attribute that will take you far. Your determination will take you were you desire to go, as long as you continue to work for what you want.

You see my strong-willed girl, not everyone has your best interest at heart. Not everyone sees the bright light inside of you. Many people fall to the wayside in life, allowing others to take from them, never asking for anything in return. Their fire burns out. I know that you will not allow that to happen to you. How do I know? I know because I say no to you at least 100 times a day, you still continue to ask me for that something you want 101 times.

That will inside of you will set a fire if you allow it. It will take you to the edges of the earth, igniting your passions and paving a way that is uniquely your own. If you remember anything that I tell you, please remember this.

I may have prayed for a calm child, but I am glad that God has given you, and everything that you are, to me. Your strong-will is not a bad thing. No matter how many people huff and tell you that you are just to darn stubborn, don’t listen to them. Be kind but be true to who you are. Hold on to your convictions, believe in yourself, and love yourself. And always hold on to that strong-will. Because one day, my determined child, you will change the world.

I am proud of you.

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