We Don’t Shelter Our Children. Here is Why.

Today we have an epidemic. Most people see it. Those who do not see it are in denial and quite possibly part of the problem.

When you have grown ups believing it is ever okay to throw a drink at someone’s face because you disagree with their political views then there is a huge problem. Drink throwing only works in the movies folks. Yes, I would love to throw a drink in an exes face, or in the face of someone who has hurt me, maybe I have even fantasized about it a time or two. It’s not for real life though people. There in lies the difference between many adults and those who are masquerading as adults. The actual adults know the difference between reality and fantasy.

Fantasy is believing everyone needs to agree with you or else they are evil. Fantasy is believing words and actions have no consequences. Fantasy is not knowing the sometimes stark realization of reality and not being able to cope when it hits you. Fantasy is believing your first world problems are ACTUAL problems.

Reality is the opposite. Reality is knowing not everyone is going to agree with you and still showing them respect. Reality is knowing life will not always go your way and knowing how to cope. Reality is knowing going without a dishwasher or dryer is not truly a problem or having to wait in a thirty minute line to eat that fancy dinner is not a real problem, it is an inconvenience sure. Problem? No. Not having clean water to drink or food to eat, now that is a real problem.

Where is the breakdown? Why do so many now adults struggle with knowing the difference between fantasy and reality? I cannot speak for everyone but I do know in many cases it has do to with being sheltered as a child.

Please hear me out. I am not talking about being protective. I believe there is a huge difference between being protective of your child and sheltering your child. We need to protect our children. It is our job as parents to guard their childhood and their hearts. They only get one childhood. We should want our children to look back on their lives and childhood with fondness and good memories. They shouldn’t have to look back and feel heartbreak and pain.

My husband and I do our best to protect our children. We have boundaries with other people, boundaries that we don’t feel bad about. We have safety measures in place to protect our home, children and ourselves. Our children know it’s important to be kind to other people but if someone is making them feel uncomfortable it is 100% okay NOT to be kind by protecting themselves. They know what to do if they are ever to get lost. They know what safe touch and bad touch is. Their safety and protection is always on the forefront of my mind.

With that said, what do I mean then when I say I don’t shelter my children? I mean I don’t shelter them from the realities of this world. You can tell the difference between a person who understand the realities of the world and a person who doesn’t have a strong grasp of reality. Look at the Presidential Election from 2016 and you can see the obvious break down. When you have college students needing safe spaces because they can’t deal with the realities of a Presidential Election, then you have to ask yourself, what is really going on? This is when you start having adults, people over the age of 18, who cannot handle reality because they were never prepared for it.

That is why we don’t shelter our children.

No, I don’t allow them to watch everything under the sun and listen to inappropriate music. That is not what I am talking about either. We protect our children from inappropriate situations, including movies that have hidden messages or adult programs.

We don’t shelter them from the realities of this world. My oldest daughter has been to 4 funerals in her short life so far. We have explained to her in terms that a child can understand, what it going on. What is death? What happens after death? Why do people die? What is a funeral?

Our children ask hard questions and we don’t shy away from answering them in terms that a child can understand. We go and visit their brother’s grave site often, with them. They know about sickness and heartache. They know that sometimes life just isn’t fair.

They also know you can still enjoy your life, love it and love people. Because we show them by our actions and also with how we talk to them.

Our children know that not everyone is going to agree with you. They have seen healthy disagreements take place amongst family and friends. Never do the disagreements get physical nor do they result in name calling and purposefully hurting one another. That is why I call it a healthy disagreement. Because after the disagreement we agree to disagree and leave it at that. We don’t allow the disagreement to come between what is more important. Relationships.

Our children know that not everyone is a safe person.

They know that not everyone is as blessed as we are, that there are children who don’t have warm beds and food in their belly.

But they are only children. Don’t they have time to learn the harsh realities of life? No. If today’s society shows us anything, it is what not to do with your children. Don’t shelter them. Don’t try to keep them from feeling hurt and disappointment when someone doesn’t agree with them or when they lose a game, feel left out etc. Yes, it’s normal to want to protect our children from this sort of pain, but don’t. Don’t keep realities from them, do not miss a chance to instill compassion and gratefulness in them.

When you do shelter your children from realities, you have “adults” throwing drinks in the faces of other people they don’t agree with and needing safe spaces because they don’t know how to cope with an election result. Don’t you want resilient children? I know I do. You do not know what life is going to throw at you. If we shelter our children from realities of the world, then we have failed to raise decent and contributing members of society, children who grow up into adults who know how to have relationships with those they don’t agree with. Adults who know how to treat other people with respect, despite their views.

Isn’t that what we all want?


How can I stay peaceful as a mom?

The past couple of weeks I have taken a short break from writing. I had decided to not spend as much time on social media actually and not writing was consequential of that. The reason I decided to take my social media accounts off my phone was because I had been complaining about how I couldn’t find any time to get everything that NEEDED done, done. Then I realized “Jenna you are being so foolish. There are 24 hours in a day and you work from home. You waste away your time when you could be more productive.” So that is when I decided to take a break. My social media accounts are still off my phone but I will be checking more often and of course writing more now too! Since becoming a wife and mom I have been on a discovery on how to create and maintain a peaceful home. I have talked about having a peaceful marriage and having peaceful children. You can also find more posts in my Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family. Peaceful Life. category. I have touched briefly on how we cannot achieve peace in our homes and with our families until we have peace with ourselves. It’s easy to say but is it really that easy to achieve? I believe that if you want peace in your life you have to put it in the forefront of your mind. Are you doing all you can to reach peace? If you have it are you doing all you can to protect it and maintain it? Peace in today’s society can be difficult to come by. There are so many different things pulling at us. Mom’s have several thoughts bouncing around in their heads. Jobs, education, our kids education, marriage, finances, devotional lives, extra curricular activities for our kids, to name just a few. There are so many others out there. I don’t believe that peace within yourself, your home, your family, or your life is something that just falls into your lap. You must really want it and you must work at it. But it is possible to grasp and very much worth it. So how do you reach this peace that I keep talking about? Does it really exist? Is it really important? Yes it does exist. Yes it is important. I have found several ways that I maintain peace within my home and family that I will share with you.


This one is tough. As a mom when do you ever get time by yourself? If you are anything like me your children and dog follow you straight into the bathroom and stare at you while you are trying to use the restroom. Or if you shut the door they bang on it. Motherhood doesn’t offer much time alone. That is why you have to make time. Get up earlier than your children. Spend time with the Lord. Get your exercise done for the day. Meditate. Eat a healthy breakfast. Or just sit in the silence of your home before it becomes chaotic. This is one that I typically struggle with. I like my sleep. I am not a morning person. But I make a concrete effort to get up before my children. Most days I can. When I do, I feel more prepared for the day. If getting up is a struggle for you but you can catch some time to yourself at nap time or after bed time, do it. Instead of worrying about what needs to get done at nap time, spend that time alone by yourself. Doing this will do more for your inner peace than you may realize.


In today’s society, especially as women, there is a lot of pressure to do it all. But we cannot do it all. And when we become so focused on all we have to do it is then when you can feel your inner peace slipping. A few weeks ago I took a look around at my messy house, my schedule, the unprepared dinner on the counter, and I had a breakdown. I beat myself up about how I couldn’t do it all. It was just too much. There were piles of laundry. A dinner I didn’t have time to cook, bills that needed paid, and so much more. Then I realized I was getting my priorities mixed up and putting too much pressure on myself to do it all. My priorities will always be God, my husband, and my children in that order. Now, your priorities may look different than mine and that is okay. My husband and children come before any job I have or anything else, that is why I made the decision to stop working recently and also why I decided to home school my children. Money is great, it buys many things, but the time I have with my children I can never get back. We decided we could live on less if it meant my entire household was at peace. It is important to know your priorities. So ask yourself. What is important to you? Are you trying to do too much? When you decide what is important and what isn’t it gets easier to shrug the things that aren’t important off.


This goes along with knowing your priorities. Give yourself grace sweet mom. You do not have to do everything. Remind yourself of this when you start to feel overwhelmed. I tell myself often “we live in our home” when I start feeling stressed about the messiness around me. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Allow yourself a break. Allow yourself to forget about cooking dinner and just pop in a pizza instead. Allow yourself to have fun and give yourself grace when you don’t feel up to par. Is anyone perfect? No they aren’t. That is okay. What is perfect anyway if you don’t have peace to go with it? Your inner peace and your family’s peace is more important than a neat and tidy house every single day.


What is it that you love? Do you love being a stay at home mom? Is it possible for you to do it? Then do it. Do you love working? Then work. Do you love to write? Then don’t waste another day and start writing. Do what you love to do. Being stuck in a career, or place, or area that you feel miserable at does not help you feel peaceful. I have heard that your “feelings don’t pay the bills” and that is true. However, staying at a job that you hate will add no value to your life. All it will do is make you more miserable. I understand that it’s not possible for everyone to do something they absolutely love but a concrete effort should be made. If you have to work try to work somewhere you like. If you can’t then try to at least find a hobby that you enjoy. Something that you love to do that will bring you happiness and joy.


As mothers we put everyone above ourselves most of the time. But taking care of yourself both physically and emotionally is so important to your children and to the state of your household. Taking care of your physical health and making it a priority should be important for a few reasons. You are showing your children that health is important and they should be healthy too. Also, although accidents happen and you never know how long you will be on earth, when you are taking care of yourself you are doing your part in striving for a long and healthy life. Emotional health is also important. That is why I have been talking so much about peace lately. Taking care of yourself can help you achieve peace within yourself.


Give those you love grace. Give grace to your children. Did your child spill her milk? Before you chastise her for being clumsy remember that accidents do happen to everyone and the likelihood of her doing it on purpose was probably slim to none. Give grace to your husband. Did he load the dishwasher in a way that you hate? Instead of nagging him try doing it yourself. Give grace to your family members. Do you not see eye to eye with your siblings or parents? Let them have their opinions and you have yours. You are different people after all. Give grace to your friends. Did your friend say something offensive? Instead of jumping to conclusions think about what your friend actually meant. Along with giving grace to those we love, we should give grace to everyone else. That person that cut in front of you while you were driving, give them grace. You never know, they may have just had the worst day of their lives. Maybe they lost someone they loved, or a job, or maybe they are rushing to the hospital. Give grace to the person who hurt you whether intentionally or unintentionally. Don’t hold grudges against them. Instead forgive. Every one of us are just humans. Everyone of us think differently, act differently, and have different opinions and thoughts. Give grace, give forgiveness, let the grudges fall away and you will start to see that you feel more peaceful and less irritated.


Gossip is a nasty time waster in my opinion. It is a way people kill time and make themselves feel better. Do yourself a favor and stay away from gossip. Don’t indulge in it. Don’t hang around people who gossip. I always tell my youngest sister, if they are gossiping to you, chances are they are gossiping about you. What gossip does is takes someone’s reputation and tarnishes it, creates lies and exaggerations and steals your inner peace. Whether the gossip is true or not ask yourself this “is it any of my business?” When you indulge in gossip about other people your mind is taken off of your priorities and is put on a story about someone else that may or may not be true. Frankly, what a person that is not living under my roof does or doesn’t do is none of my business. When you steer away from this quicksand your life becomes much more drama free and more peaceful.  It is well worth it.


I wake up every morning and spend time with God. I enjoy this quiet time in his presence. I am reminded of his love for me and the sacrifice that he made when he gave his only son on the cross. I pray for many things but especially for the day ahead of me. This time with him resets me. It gets my mind ready for the day. It is a vital part of my day.


Sometimes I think that we start to feel stressed out and lose our inner peace when we say yes to too many things. It is easy to feel pressured to say yes to everything that is asked of us but sometimes we just have to say no. That is okay. Your peace and the peace of your family is just that important. I am a homebody. There’s nothing I love more than staying home with my family and doing nothing except spending time alone with them. I try not to make mine and my family’s schedule too full because this time together is precious as well as important. My kids enjoy the down time and the time alone with me and my husband. My husband enjoys it. This is why I limit activities for my daughters. My 4 year old is currently doing two activities. She wanted to add gymnastics back in with the other two activities as well. Although I was tempted to let her, I said no she had to wait until she was done with one other activity. This is because I want her to understand the importance of down time and also because it is my job to make sure my daughter’s life is peaceful. What are some ways you can protect that peace for your family? Are you saying yes to much? Are your kids running ragged in too many activities? Remember it is always okay to say no.

Peace is so important. You cannot reach peace in your marriage or with your children until you have inner peace. I hope that you have found something helpful in today’s post that you can take away with you to help achieve a peaceful life and protect it.

Until next time!

Jenna Jury

Peaceful Marriage

Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family.             Peaceful Life. Part three.

Peaceful Marriage 

Today I want to talk about having a peaceful marriage and how it contributes to having an overall peaceful family and peaceful life. If you have not been following along with my current series Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family. Peaceful Life. you can read the first two posts here:

Part 1 when you have to make the hard decisions.

Part 2 creating a peaceful home.
My goal as a homemaker, wife and mom has always been to create a peaceful atmosphere where my family, the ones I love the most, can come in and just forget all about the outside world. I have learned many lessons since becoming a wife about how to create a peaceful atmosphere. I have learned that it starts within yourself before you can begin to create a peaceful atmosphere in your home. You have to have a peaceful mind first. Another lesson I have learned is that in order for my home to be peaceful my marriage must be peaceful. But how do I do that? Marriage is the union of two very different people in most cases. How do you take those two very different personalities, with different needs, desires, quirks, and upbringings and still create a peaceful marriage and home life? It may seem impossible to some but it’s not and I want to share with you how my husband and I achieve a peaceful marriage despite our differences.

If you know me and my husband well, you know that we have a very peaceful and fun marriage. It’s not because we are anything alike or even that we had similar upbringings. Actually we both had  very different upbringings and our personalities are nowhere near similar. He is outgoing and talkative. Me not so much. He can’t sit still and I love “my down time.” He is such a morning person it can be nauseating. I can’t function unless I have had at least two cups of coffee. But despite our differences our marriage is strong and peaceful. How? There are several things we do to ensure peace within our marriage. Some of them we have done from the beginning. Others we have learned the hard way throughout it. Below are ways we keep peace within our marriage.

  • Make decisions together

When I married my husband, I vowed to share my life with him. We decided that we were in this thing called life together. Since we are in it together, doesn’t it make sense to make decisions together? I have heard many people say that the decision is their decision and their spouse can get over it. Well good for you. Let me know how your marriage is doing in about six months and then we will see if you feel the same way. Decisions, especially big decisions should be made together because it doesn’t just affect you. Every decision you make affects someone else by default. You may not see how it affects them but it does. And often times our spouse may see something that we don’t see and it can be useful to have their wisdom when making a decision. I touched more on this in safe guarding my marriage. 

  • Discuss any decisions with your spouse

Okay so I know that I just said to make decisions with your spouse. And you should make decisions with your spouse. But there are some things that we decide on our own like activities we may do with the kids or going out with our friends. Now please don’t get me wrong. My husband and I are very considerate of one another and we never tell each other what we can or cannot do. If my husband wants to do something and asks me “if I care” I always say “well that’s a silly question, you’re a grown man you can do whatever you want” and vice versa.  But I always run my decisions by my husband just to make sure he’s okay with them. Maybe he had something else planned or maybe he wanted some alone time with me or to do something with the kids. It’s always a good idea to make sure you keep an open line of communication with your spouse. It really will save you from misunderstandings and silly arguments in the future.

  • Keep arguments between you and your spouse

Speaking of arguments. I know I said my husband and I have a very peaceful marriage but that doesn’t mean it isn’t without fault. We do have our occasional argument. But when we do argue we try our very best to keep those arguments to ourselves. We don’t allow our families to see us arguing because it may cause them to feel awkward or it may make them feel as though they can insert their two cents into our marriage and that’s one place our family’s two cents is never allowed. We also do our best never to argue in front of our children. Children need to know their home life is secure and peaceful. Arguing in front of children will make them feel turmoil and uncertainty. Even if you know that your marriage is secure, your child may not. In order to maintain peace for them it is important to keep arguments private.

  • Let your spouse be themselves and enjoy hobbies

I have had a couple friends tell me that some of their friends think it is weird or not good that their husbands play video games or hang out with friends  while playing these video games. First of all- what?? Second of all, here is how I see it. My mom used to tell me that she would much rather her husband be playing video games than be out at a bar late at night. Don’t you have a hobby that you enjoy? Reading? Shopping? Coffee with friends? Allow your husband to have a hobby that he enjoys. Something that he can do to get away from the busyness of life and stress of work. Yes I love my husband and I love my children but sometimes I need to do something for me. Why is he any different?

  • Don’t nag 

Proverbs 27:15 says the nagging wife is like a dripping faucet. Ouch. I don’t want to be compared to an annoying, dripping faucet do you? I try to steer clear of asking my husband to do something over and over. If there is something that needs to be done and I can do it myself then I do. But if it is something only he can do then I will ask him once and he always gets to it whenever he is able. He doesn’t need me to constantly remind him of something. I am not his mother and he is not my child. I have heard some women tell their husbands how to dress or do their hair. I think that is absurd. Most people learn to dress themselves at a very young age. Chances are your spouse did as well and they don’t need your help. I never tell my husband what to do or how to do something. There may be some things that he does that I am not particularly fond of. For example; the way my spouse loads the dishwasher is completely different than how I load it. I strategically load it to make everything fit and make sure as much as I can get in there gets in it. My husband on the other hand will not load it completely full. He hates doing the dishwasher. That’s okay. Instead of nagging him to do it the way I like, I just do it myself. It gets done the way I like when I do it and then my husband doesn’t have to do something he hates while listening to me nag him. Everyone wins. Please remember your spouse is your partner not your child.

  • Keep everyone else out of your marriage

I touched base on this earlier but it is so important to a peaceful marriage that I want to talk about it again. My marriage consists of two people. My husband and myself. My parents aren’t in my marriage, my friends aren’t in my marriage, my siblings aren’t in my marriage, etc. It’s me and him. But sometimes there are people in our lives that’s just won’t stay out of our marriages. Maybe they won’t stop cutting down your spouse or pointing out their flaws. Maybe they know about past arguments or mistakes and won’t let them go. Maybe they won’t stop trying to insert themselves into your discussions or decisions that are between you and your spouse. My mom gave me some sound advice before I got married and I never forgot it. She said after you get married please don’t tell me anything that you and your husband disagree or argue about. Keep the private things private. It is hard for a parent to stay neutral. It is hard for any family member really. So in order to make it easier for our family members and friends it is important to keep them out of your marriage. How do you do that though? I was blessed with understanding parents and family members who keep their two cents to themselves, at least when it comes to my marriage with my husband. But what if you have a parent or family member or friend who just won’t stay out? First bring it to God in prayer. Ask him for guidance and wisdom when it comes that person. Secondly keep anything that is private and between you and your spouse out of any conversation with that person. It may be hard at first but eventually it will get easier. If it doesn’t seem as though that person is getting the hint, maybe they keep trying to push themselves into your marriage, then it would be wise to have a mature sit down with them about your boundaries. My husband and I have had sit downs with people before about boundaries. I can tell you that although the conversation is difficult at the time in the long run they are always worth it and almost always create a much better relationship all around.

  • Let the little things go

We all have quirks. There are things about me that my husband doesn’t really care for and vice versa. For example, right  now as I am typing this there is a laundry basket of clothes in our room that has been sitting there for about five days. No joke. I hate putting away my clothes and if I can put it off I will. This drives my husband batty. He is organized and likes everything neat and tidy. But our room right now is anything but tidy. And it is completely my fault. I know it is. Instead of nagging me or getting upset that I am unorganized or messy he just lets it go. Something that we both tell each other when we joke about our quirks is “you knew who I was when you married me.” And it’s true. So those little things that may be annoying you but honestly don’t really matter in the long run, learn to let them go and just enjoy your spouse. You will invite peace in to your marriage when you do.

  • Have fun together 

I married a very funny man. Well at least in my opinion. He makes me laugh on a daily basis. If we know how to do anything it is have fun together. Now I don’t mean we go out all the time because we don’t. But we do enjoy each other’s company. We appreciate the time we have together. We make memories with one another and with our children. Those are the moments that I look forward to and that really create a strong connection and bond. When you have fun together it also allows stress to leave and puts back into perspective what truly matters.

When you let go of all the little things that don’t matter in the long run, when you stop nagging and start appreciating, when you love your spouse and your marriage then you are able to invite peace in and a peaceful marriage is an beautiful thing you guys. It truly is.

Until next time

Jenna Jury

Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family. Peaceful Life.



Part Two

Creating A Peaceful Home

Creating a peaceful home is the second post in my series titled Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family. Peaceful Life. Read the first post When you have to make the hard decisions here.

If you were to ask anyone what they desire most in their life (other than a fatter paycheck) most people would probably say peace. As much as it is desired, so many people lack it. Why? Is it really that difficult to have peace? I would venture to say no it’s not. Even though there are some circumstances beyond our control that can create anxiety and turmoil in our lives, peace can be achieved. After my son passed away I dealt with quite a bit of anxiety. My family experienced severe turmoil for quite a while. Sometimes that anxiety still pops up but I have learned how to cultivate the peace of God in my life. It is the one thing I desire on an everyday basis…. a peaceful home and life.

There is one sound that sends needles into my flesh and that is the sound of a child throwing a tantrum. Not just any child. My child. I hate the sound of either one of them throwing tantrums. Because it is chaotic, forceful, obnoxious, and very annoying. That is how I would describe anything that comes into our life and steals our peace. When your peace is stolen, anxiety starts to set in and it’s like a screaming child throwing a tantrum. A nagging sound inside of your head that just wont go away. Now my oldest daughter B does not throw as many tantrums as she used to. We showed her how to translate her frustration and seek a better way to communicate and for the most part she is able to control herself. In the same way we need to train ourselves to seek the peace in our homes and lives. But how? Is it really that easy to come by? Can you truly achieve peace in your home? Your marriage? Your family? Your life? Yes you can. And it all starts with you.

It starts with a peaceful mind…

I learned several years ago that in order for me to have a peaceful life and home it had to start with me. Inside of my mind. There is no way to have a peaceful home life if there is turmoil and chaos inside of your mind. How did I get rid of the chaos that often times made a home inside my mind? I first gave it to God. I offered all the anxiety up to him. I know it’s not always that easy. I dealt with anxiety for a while and I know what it can do to your mind and your life. But one day I surrendered it to God and then decided to make an effort with every ounce of my being to not pick that anxiety back up. Yes, there are days I start to feel it creep back inside my mind. But when that happens I hit my knees in prayer immediately and pray to God for his peace and joy and for him to take it from me. Spending time in the word and prayer is my number one defense for a peaceful mind. I also have learned that in order to have a peaceful mind you cannot hold on to grudges. It is easy, especially when you feel wronged. But grudges don’t do anything except steal your joy. Forgiveness or even asking for forgiveness when you know you have done something against someone is another way to keep a peaceful mind. When my mind is at peace that is when I am able to make my home peaceful.

A peaceful atmosphere for everyone…

A few years ago I read something in a blog post that hit home for me. I really wish I wrote down what blog it was and who wrote it so I could link it for you all. The author talked about creating a peaceful atmosphere for everyone in the home. This includes your husband. She said that whenever her husband would come home she would immediately unleash all her frustrations and burdens from the day unto him and not even give him a chance to unwind. She realized later in her marriage that this was not doing either one of them any good and was not creating a peaceful home. She explained that when our spouses come home they need to be able to unwind and relax. Don’t meet them at the door and unload everything on them. You may feel better but your spouse now has their burdens from the day and your burdens as well. It doesn’t create a peaceful atmosphere for them. You see your home should be a safe haven for everyone in your family to be able to come to and relax, unwind, and get away from the outside world and any problems they may have. This doesn’t just include you but also your spouse and your children. When they come home do they feel at peace? Do they feel as though they are in a safe space and able to forget anything that may be going on at school, work, or even with friends? So how do you create that safe haven? Especially if you have small children?

  • Allow everyone in your home to unwind and relax. If there is something you need to discuss with your spouse save it for a time where you are alone with them. Don’t discuss important matters in front of your children. Don’t discuss your children in front of them either.
  • Turn off distractions, television, cell phone, iPad, etc. for a while and have family time. Don’t bring the electronics to the table. Keep that time as family time where you can discuss the good parts of your day with each other. Cutting out the noise and focusing on those you love is a great way to bring peace to your home.
  • I am a huge supporter of QUIET TIME for everyone in the house, including yourself. Children need rest, even if they aren’t napping. My 4 year old plays quietly in her room during quiet time. She doesn’t have to nap but quiet time is not an option. It’s important for all of us. This time allows all of us to rest and restore ourselves after a busy morning. I am able to have some quiet time alone so I can give my children and my husband my best in the evening. Quiet time doesn’t have to be long. Just long enough for you to get some time and for your children to get some time.
  • Keep any problems or arguments between you and your spouse (or the person you have a spat with). I can’t stand gossiping. I don’t like when people talk about other people to me and spread their issues like wildfire. It does no good and it just causes turmoil in your mind. I have found that if you stay out of people’s business and mind your own, your life is a lot more peaceful. I don’t rant to my husband about people, he doesn’t rant to me. That’s not how I want to spend my free time and energy. Instead I enjoy my family. I enjoy each moment I have with them. 

There are a few little things I do to create a peaceful atmosphere as well. I will sometimes put on worship music or light a candle. We also have a wood burning stove and I have found that starting a fire in it on a cold night and throwing some blankets on the couch creates a very comfy and peaceful atmosphere. However, you can have a dozen candles lit and several blankets all over, if you don’t have peace in your mind and heart first, you won’t have peace in your home.

Until next time!
Jenna Jury


Making Hard Decisions

Peaceful Home. Peaceful Family. Peaceful Life. 

Part one: When you have to make the hard decisions. 

Over the next couple of weeks join me as I share with you a series of posts that have been on my heart. The series is titled Peaceful home. Peaceful family. Peaceful life. I will share with you the journey I have been on discovering what it means to have a peaceful home, family, and life. The steps you can take to achieve peace, why having a peaceful life is important and what God says about peace. To start off the series I want to share with you sort of a prelude into the series.

When you have to make a hard decision. 

If you ask my husband he would tell you that I am probably the most indecisive person he has ever met. When we go out to eat I have a difficult time helping him decide where to go. Maybe it’s because I don’t like being selfish and I want to eat where I know everyone would like. Do any of you have a difficult time making decisions? I try. I really do. To be more decisive. But when I am faced with a decision often times I dwell on it way to long. Afraid of making the wrong one. There has been a few times in my life where I have been faced with a difficult decision. The hardest decision I was ever faced with the Lord took out of my hands and made the decision for me. It was when my son’s heart had stopped beating. The doctors brought him back but he had been down for far too long. The doctor on call told me I had to make a decision. I could leave him on the machines but there was no guarantee that he would have much of a life, he could possibly be brain dead because of being gone for so long. Or I could unhook the machines and hold him while he passed on. I couldn’t decide in that moment because I already felt like my heart was outside of my body. A couple of minutes later the Lord took that decision from me and chose to take him home. I was both relieved and heartbroken in that moment. Relieved that I didn’t have to make the decision and heartbroken that it wasn’t the decision I wanted. I am no stranger to being faced with a hard decision. So what do you do when you are faced with a hard decision? When you have to make a decision that will affect other people? When you aren’t quite sure what will happen when you make the decision?

My husband recently went to a prayer meeting where our Pastor said something that really helped me see decisions differently. He said that when we have to make a decision we need to pray the Lord gives us the decision. We can’t make the decision and then pray the Lord blesses it. We have to pray that he shows us what the right decision is.

Over the past few months I have been faced with a decision that was difficult to make. I fretted over it. Thought about how it would affect my family. Fretted over how it would affect other people. Worried and fretted some more. You see my family is the most important thing the Lord has ever blessed me with. I work from home so that I can be with my children and raise them in the Lord. My husband and I decided a couple years ago that we are going to homeschool our children. But I realized months ago that in order for me to homeschool my children effectively it needs to be my main focus. So the decision came down to earning extra income or losing income and going back to being a SAHM. But I had a hard time seeing how losing income would be beneficial to my family. But I knew in my heart that raising my children to love God, being present to teach them and help them learn was the most important job I could ever have. I allowed this decision to consume me and worry me way to long. But I have learned a few things through all of this. So what do you do when faced with a hard decision?

Pray the Lord gives you the decision. Don’t make a decision and then pray that he blesses it. 

One reason I had a hard time making my decision was because I had already made up in my mind that I had to work. It’s just merely too hard to make it in today’s society unless the wife works right? But that’s not true. After my husband shared with me what our Pastor said at the prayer meeting I knew I had been trying to make the decision and pray it was the right one. We cannot do that. I did not have any peace in the decision I had already made. That was how I knew I was trying to force my decision. Is there a decision you have to make? Did you pray the Lord shows you the right decision or did you make it without seeking God first? Pray God gives you guidance to make the right one.

Pray God gives you peace after he gives you your decision. 

When the Lord gave me my decision, which was to go back to being a SAHM and focus on raising my children as well as beginning homeschooling, I instantly felt peaceful. I had known it was the right decision because of the enormous sense of peace God gave me. I hadn’t realized how much anxiety I was feeling until after I made my decision. But peace followed and that is how I want to live my life.  Is there something you’re facing today? Is it a difficult decision? Pray God gives you peace after he gives you your decision. When you feel peaceful you will know the right decision has been made.

Pray God shows those in your life  guidance in the decision as well. 

Yes, the decision was ultimately mine but it was going to affect my entire family. This was why I needed to seek my husband’s guidance and wisdom. I prayed God would show my husband if I was missing anything from him. I was blessed with a very supportive husband. He would support me in any thing I decide but when I made my decision he knew it was the right one because God had told him it was as well. He just allowed me to figure it out first. Is there someone in your life that you can ask God to give guidance to help you? Do it. It is always nice to have someone praying for you in case you miss something from the Lord.

In life we are often faced with difficult decisions but seeking God in prayer is exactly what we need to do when we are. It is on our knees where we will find peace. A peaceful home. A peaceful family. A peaceful life is what I desire. And that starts with me seeking after God in the the big things and in the hard decisions.

God says

” And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ” Philippians 4:7


“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” Colossians 3:15
Those are just two scriptures God gives us on living a peaceful life. The word of God is filled with many more. He desires to give us his peace. It is up to us to seek it. It is up to us to ask him for help and guidance in the big and hard things so that we can start or continue living a peaceful life.

Until next time!
Jenna Jury